I have done some already and it was amazing.
A survivor never gets a chance to talk to the abuser after the courts get involve. For most survivor I have met, they still want to express the hurt and pain to the abuser. Some still carry lost, shame, fear and hopelessness. From what they told me, they are still looking for a deeper healing, closure and empowerment in their lives.
So I play the part of their abuser/offender. They tell me what ever is alive in them and I reflect, re-frame or restate paraphrasing back what I hear. I create space and support. For a few, I can tell when they see me as their abuser because they go back to feeling small, dis-empowered and hopeless. I totally get it. So I encouraged them to speak their mind. Once they started, O my God, it was amazing and healing. Every time a saw them cry, I cried with them. I can't help it. I always kept eye contact even if they couldn't, but in the end, they did, every time!!! This is so hard for me and I love it. But now what I am seeing is there need to be a better support group involved. Weather a counselor, therapist, normal support group or trusted family member, I will not do it by myself anymore. Outside support MUST be there other than me.
And for one more note, I will always do this work for free for the sake of healing, freedom and closure, but may I ask you to pay me for the value that I create, so that I may continue to do the work I love to do and to help other that can not pay me. I still want to help them.
Community / Prison Returnee Mediation
I will be using N.V.C. in these mediation working on fears and goals. To hear and to be heard. This is so important. People leaving mad, afraid with nothing answered is the worst way to go.
Let us show you a better way.
So what is the
ACCOUNTABILITY LETTER BANK?
So if you live in Washington and you wish to write a letter to the victim that they can receive if they knows to ask D.O.C. They will give them your letter if it meets the guidelines.
Contact Victim Services staff by:
Our focus here is to find healthy outlet that are fun and still create safety for everyone. So I am forming groups with sponcers, group safety plans and lot of accountability.
This would include, biking and hiking. Over night camping trips. Fishing and so on. We need to do this together, with C.C.O. and D.O.C. awareness. (is there a C.C.O. who will join us?) Being healthy is the goals here. We need ideas on what we want to do. Who all is going to join us, and if it costs a little, we'll save up for it. We can still stay close by and paint, pottery, or have Think and Grow Rich classes. It is up to you. Remember, we can do this. I am in King County Washington, But if you need help and you are some were else. I will still help and research if you have the group. Remember, our focus is safety and healthy.